For years i felt like i belonged to some other place. I was born and grew up in Göteborg, on the west coast of Sweden. My father is Swedish, my mother is Finnish. I grew up with my mother, and i always identified with her Finnish roots. Every summer we went to Finland, i learned some (not much) Finnish, and felt like i belonged there.
Turning 20 i decided to move there. I went "home", or so i thought. I quickly discovered that they did not much care for me there. My family relations there were not especially happy to see me, nor did they keep much in touch. The swedish speaking minority was not very open, to put it mildly. I thought we would through a common language be able to communicate, but i soon found out that there was not much in common there.
In short, it would take years to adapt. Hence i have done exactly that, and found a place for me. Now having lived in Helsinki for close to 18 years i consider it "home". But as i walk these streets i realise i am not from here. Now i consider myself "Swedish", whatever that means. So i continue to be an "outsider". Not in the sense of being an outcast, or not being accepted, but inside of me, i still continue to feel this differenceness. Perhaps it is like an itch that you get so used to that you do not want to let it go.
Funny that.